Dixieland and Owl City

What a perfect night!

We have a great Activity Days program in our ward for the 8- to 11-year-old girls.  The previous leader was just fantastic and came up with some great activities.  She was just released and then called as the new Relief Society president, but the new leader is going to do a great job as well.  I asked her tonight if she was excited for her new calling, and she said it was one of those callings she always wanted, and was always jealous of those who had it when she didn't.  :)

Tonight the activity was for the girls to meet at Central Park on Main Street in Broken Arrow, for the free "Tuesdays in the Park" concert.  Families were invited too, so Erika and I joined Savannah for the evening.  The performers were a Dixieland jazz band and they were really good - playing and singing old jazz and swing standards on trombone, trumpet, clarinet, banjo, bass, and drums.  The weather was incredible - low 70s with a light breeze, just right.  The little girls were up and dancing to the music; there were lots of friends from church there to visit with; bees were humming, sweet birds singing; kids could go down to the creek and try to catch crawfish; and the activity leader provided us with popcorn, skittles, and M&M's.  When the concert ended, I didn't want to get up out of my lawn chair; I could have stayed there all night.

After the concert, we drove Erika's friend home out in the country.  It was dark by then, and we rolled all the windows down and opened the sunroof, and listened to an Owl City CD.  So nice and peaceful, and perfect music to end the day with.

Then we came home and saw the Thunder win game 1 of the NBA Finals.  Like I said - a perfect night!  :)

"If thou art merry, praise the Lord with singing, with music, with dancing, and with a prayer of praise and thanksgiving."

 ~ Doctrine and Covenants 136:28

Maniacs and Idiots

I don't recommend ever going out of your way to listen to the late George Carlin; he had a severe case of potty-mouth.  However, I did hear him say something one time that was both humorous and accurate.  He was talking about driving on highways, and he observed that when you're out there, everyone driving faster than you is a maniac, and everyone driving slower than you is an idiot.

I think most of us can probably relate to this observation.  It's similar to the study I heard about once, where a survey found that something like 90% of us think we are above average drivers.  Well, by definition, half of us have to be below average, but very few of us think we're in that bottom half!

Unfortunately, poor manners and hotheadedness on the roads seems to be the norm more often than not these days.  I don't think I've ever given in to full blown road rage, but I will confess that it is an occasional weakness of mine to immediately have all sorts of bad feelings towards other drivers who I think aren't driving the way they should.  I spend several hours driving every day for work, traveling between appointments, and so I get plenty of opportunities to experience all types of drivers.

Today, coming home from church, I had just such an opportunity; I was driving 50 miles an hour down a country road, with no one behind me for a long distance.  A car pulled right out in front of me from a neighborhood entrance, causing me to slow way down for the rest of the stretch until we came to the next stop sign.  Of course, I had the annoyed feeling that I needed to get right on this other car's tail and let them know just how rude it was of them to not wait until I was past to pull out, and to make sure they knew just how peeved I was.

Maybe it was because I was coming home from church.  But I immediately had the impression that I needed to think about that driver differently.  In fact, from where I was, I couldn't even see the driver at all - it was very sunny, I was driving a minivan while they were in a small car, and they were fairly short.  So I couldn't see if it was male or female, old or young.  I instantly got an imaginary picture in my mind of the other driver.  It was a kind young woman, just like the meek and humble young women of our ward.  Perhaps she donated blood regularly at the Red Cross, or helped at the food bank.  Maybe she was distraught about a sick mother or sibling, or on her way to visit her grandparents on the Sabbath, and just didn't see me coming.  Maybe she did see me in her rear view mirror after pulling out and felt really bad about what was really a trifling action of little importance.  Maybe she was an investigator, or a friend of one of the young women in our ward, who was in the process of discovering the gospel.

OK, so it was all in my imagination, and I really actually had no idea who the other driver was or what he or she was like.  But my heart instantly softened.  I eased back on the gas and made sure I stayed a good distance back.  What was I in such a hurry for, anyway?  It wasn't going to hurt me if I had to wait one extra minute before getting home to take my tie off.

I was grateful for the reminders I received at that moment, and thought that maybe the Lord actually wanted  that driver to pull out in front of me, to teach me a little lesson about patience and kindness and forgiveness -- and love.

"Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof: and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit.  Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry: for anger resteth in the bosom of fools."
 ~ Ecclesiastes 7: 8-9

Hearts and Dreams

One of the things I love most about my job is the amount of time I get to spend listening to good music.  I don't mind twenty to thirty minutes of windshield time with beautiful music to accompany the drive, and the Tulsa library system has a great selection of CDs to choose from and borrow.

Anyway, today I was listening to a Loreena McKennitt CD I borrowed from the library, and one of her lyrics made a deep impression on me.

Here is my heart, I give it to you

Take me with you across this land

These are my dreams, so simple and few

Dreams we hold in the palm of our hands.

I thought of my wonderful wife Nicole as I listened to that song.  I'm sure she never thought, growing up in Idaho, that she would one day end up living in Missouri for nine years, followed by Oklahoma for going on seven now.  I think she likes it here; in fact she once mentioned in one of our talks together that she wouldn't choose to move away if I was tragically gone -- she would stay here and finish raising our family in Broken Arrow.  I know she doesn't want to go back to Idaho; she has grown to like midwestern heat and humidity, and every time we visit the mountains, she says it's way too cold!

But back to the lyric.  The vast majority of women I know, especially in the church, have indeed taken their dreams, "simple and few", and placed them in the palms of their husbands' hands.  In our ward here in Oklahoma, there are dozens of transplants from Utah and Idaho and other points who have come here following the husband's career.  They have left friends and family behind and set out on their own life together, usually wherever the employment prospects have taken them.

For the most part, the righteous women that I know have very simple dreams.  They want a righteous and loving husband who is a kind and caring father to their children, who honors his priesthood, and who provides safety and peace of mind through his employment.  This is not to say that these women are unable to take care of themselves; I don't know a single honest man in my ward who would not say that their wives could do just as well if not better than them in careers and taking care of a family.  But for whatever reason, these beautiful, faithful women place their trust in their husbands, and allow him - however imperfectly - to follow his path wherever it takes them.

When we, as husbands, do anything that does not keep the oath and covenant of the priesthood, and fail to honor the covenants we have made in the temple, it is, quite simply, a betrayal of the trust that our wives and children have placed in us.  When we choose to commit sin of any kind, we are, symbolically, no different than the man who takes his wedding ring off before heading out into the night with the intent to be unfaithful.  Even something as simple as failing to have our personal prayers not only offends God and deadens our own soul, but literally hurts the precious family that has been entrusted to us.

Our wives have given us their hearts.  They have invited us to take them with us across life's journey.  In many cases, they have sacrificed their own personal desires and wishes on the altar of the marriage and family, trusting that in doing so, even greater blessings await.  We can do nothing less than the same -- the absolute giving of ourselves and complete elimination of self-centeredness and pride -- if we want to be worthy of the love and trust that has been placed in us.

"Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else."

  ~ Doctrine and Covenants 42:22

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it."

 ~ Ephesians 5:25